There's been debate and many reports on the authenticity of scientific research regarding the claim that Gender Dysphoria is based on medical (not mental) evidence. Here's proof that its medical. Doctors are NOT scientists and they have no clue what researchers have discovered. I'll take the word of a reputable Scientific Journal than a Jim Crow Doctor from Louisiana trying to propagate and spread dis information that is detrimental to members of my community and running for public office.
In order to get published in a reputable Scientific Journal, one has to be able to back up their research from peers and skeptics through questions aimed at poking holes in their findings. Once this occurs and the scientist can back up their hypothesis and research, it gets published. This is not a "philosophical" or "whimsical" hypothesis. This is based on hard core facts, research and evidence. This is why we need Democratic Presidential candidates to take this issue seriously in the next election. This aint no Tyler Perry "Media" issue or the Ru Paul's "Drag Race." Lady Ga Ga said it correctly. We were born this way at conception.
I wanted to thank the alt right trolls who lambasted my web-series I'm Your Mum because I stood up against hatred and bigotry in my words and films. They mainly came from Ashe County and Pitt County North Carolina. A few where fellow filmmakers who until now I regarded as my friends. No more.
The majority came from my Facebook Page called Sins of Ashe County. I made some anti Trump posts and their right wing wackos and redneck Nazi's came after me for it. I want to thank them for making me more determined than ever to make a comeback. I don't back down full stop. I have a thick skin. You have to have that if you want to survive in acting/film-making. My determination will not be stifled. It's my jet fuel to rocket forward.
Let me be clear. I support the rights of all marginalized groups and people. They should be given equal protection under the law. I do not support the President and his policies against such people and groups. As an artist filmmaker I have a right to speak out and write about such things in my films.
At my age you learn a lot about people's behavior and you wonder what their motivation is. But who cares. Most critics are wimps who live in their mother's basement and have no friends. If I could leave indie filmmakers with one thought it would this. Take the hate you get from them and find some truth in what was said...if any. Are there things that you could change? For me it was my British accent.
In my case one critics was a washed up actor who made slasher porn movies from the 1980's and he's a has been. So that made me feel better about my work. I didn't feel so bad.
Have a thick skin and if after doing some soul searching you can think of any way you can make your project better, then do it. It's kind of like drinking a soda. After the vitriol from your critics subsides (like soda fizz) then regroup, refocus and renew your commitment to putting out good content for people to enjoy. Another way to handle it is to tell them where to go and leave it be.
I'm so grateful for the blessing I've been given and it's up to me to share this message. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. said:
"There come a time when silence is betrayal." "Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter." "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." "Only in the darkness can you see the stars."
- Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
What matters is that (as Joe Biden says) "We are in a battle for the soul of America." I can't allow members of my community to go unnoticed, disrespected and shut out of the American Dream from a bunch of old white guys using white privilege to keep us out. We all matter, we all count, we all belong and we all mean something to someone or something precious to us like a family pet or fur baby.
We will win. We will win. Not as Democrats or Republicans or even Independents. We will ALL win as Americans in 2020.
So tired of the battles and the fights and the death. The inability of humans to be good, kind and decent to one another. So tired of hearing about human suffering going unabated or someone stepping up to heal the wounds and the pain. I'm worn out by all the hatred. God must be crying in heaven. Dear Lord make it stop for all of us.
And God said to me, "That is why I made you Sile." "You and everyone else like you can make a difference." I'm still tired Lord, but not as tired as the children crying themselves to sleep tonight because their parents where taken away. Devastated youth that should never experience such sorrow at such a young age.
How can the people who let this ghost into our house, deny these children sympathy and mercy? Lord take the hate from my heart for these heartless bastards causing such pain to our country, because that's what I have for them.
I accept and respect immigrants to this country. I accept people of color I accept LGBTQ+ community. I accept members of marginalized communities for which I'm a member of one of them. We will not be erased or ignored. Lord, please hear ALL our prayers. Not just from the rich white connected males who run this country, but from ALL your children. We know that your love isn't exclusive it is inclusive. We know that you made us this way for a reason. We know we are loved and accepted by our creator God.
I'm not a politician. I'm an indie filmmaker/actress. I'm going to do everything I can to help elect whomever the Democrats nominate and campaign on his or her behalf. I would work for free to make that happen. We can no longer tolerate the Republicans and this current administration as they're also not a fan of the LGBTQ+ community for which I'm a part.
Democrats get it together and let's do this. Let's beat Donald Trump in 2020 and beyond!
I was sent an email from the Democratic Party and it was about enrolling in an online free training course for public service. Not sure if I'm going to do it, but what if? Here's a quick simple view.
If I was running against Thom Tillis, I would assure the state that my purpose for running would be to represent all members of the state not just LGBTQ+ people. That we need to make sure that folks who can work are given an opportunity and if their job is going elsewhere or is no longer viable, then we train them (free of charge) to gain a new skill. A former tobacco farmer could become a wind farmer or solar panel farmer. You could also have said technologies with cattle eating the grass around it so that you wouldn't have to mow. Not moo, but mow.
To that end, we need to make sure that no child goes hungry or is homeless or doesn't have proper clothing. They're only so much that teachers can do and they're doing more than their job description. We need to PAY TEACHERS more and pay WOMAN equal to what we pay men!
Teachers and Veterans are two major groups of people keeping this country together. We let them down while they're lifting us up. We need to treat them like the rock stars they are.
I come from a family of Veterans mostly WWII. My family hunted and they also fought to keep this country free as they were part of the greatest generation. So of course we don't take people's guns (other than AK47 Assault weapons) and we protect our second amendment rights. We will get comprehensive (and or common sense) gun reform passed and it will become the law of the land. We will reinstate the Assault Weapons Ban immediately.
If someone says to me, "You aint taking my AR15 or AK47," then we would say to them, you don't need an assault rifle to hunt Bambi; Therefore, we would administer a "buy back" program for assault weapons and any guns said people would like to return for cash payments. The money would come from revenue gained from illegal drug busts.
If gun owners (who own AR15 or AK47) don't like that Idea, then we would make it mandatory for them to enlist into the Armed Forces to go fight for our country. If you want the responsibility of owning such a powerful weapon, then you can fight for your freedom to own one. We will make open carry laws illegal in our state. If you need a license to drive a car you should have a license to own a gun. I would also raise the age to buy a gun in NC from 18 to 21.
In NC guns are a big deal. I would work with hunting enthusiasts and responsible gun owners to promote safety and proper use of a firearm to first time gun owners or people who are purchasing a gun or are considering it for the first time. But only after a complete and thorough background check. To those who do not choose gun ownership, work with self defense folks to offer self defense classes to woman and the elderly who are most vulnerable to an attack from a would be thief or criminal.
The bottom line is too many children and people are killed by gun violence and it's ridiculous, shameful and sad. We need everyone to stand up and protest. What good are jobs and a strong economy if we're constantly having to bury our children. Gun reform now.
Violence is not the answer to solve your disputes. The old adage is to walk away or get distance from any volatile situation you find yourself in works. Recognize the consequences as well if one precipitates violence towards another. The consequence to working differences out civilly is proactive and the law.
Sadly the President of this country thinks it's OK to stoke hatred of marginalized communities by pitting them against each other. One has to know that's not right. One might not like one group or the other, but deep seeded hatred and acts of violence against said group is wrong, evil, unacceptable and against the law. You're arse will be put in jail and you will do your time.
Regarding health care. I would keep ACA and make it better. Offer a Public Option, expand Medicaid in North Carolina and offer Medicare for all. I would support Joe Biden's plan and mental health would be covered automatically and it would be available as part of a patient's basic medical care.
Immediate mental health care and coverage would be offered in every policy and nobody would be denied mental health coverage. As with medical insurance, no pre-existing conditions either. Trans care as well as LGBTQ+ care would be covered as well as cis-gender care for cis-woman. They should be making their own medical decisions about their body with their doctors help. Not a bunch of white men in a room making health decision for her.
Most importantly I would promote unity. I wouldn't tweet like the current president does and I would respect the rule of law. I would stand up for every right and when the occasion called for it I would be "counselor and chief." I would also be "solutions and chief" for North Carolinian's.
I would offer solutions that would comfort the sick and advocate for the disadvantaged and marginalized communities in my state and the country. In addition I would take and accept council from advisors and educated professionals with domestic, financial and foreign policy experience.
I would also take immediate action on climate change by gathering scientist investigating it and heed their advice while incentivizing other country's who may be bigger polluters than we are to get with the program and bring down emissions to recommend levels by our climate change scientists.
I'm not there yet on capital punishment. I would be willing to sit down and talk with focus groups and law enforcement in order to make my decision. I would work hard on day one in NC to fight the inequities of our justice system. I believe there is a disproportionate ratio of persons of color and black people incarcerated in our prisons that needs to be addressed. I would also go after white collar criminals with a vengeance.
I would not disrespect or dishonor the legacy of former President Barack Obama and I wouldn't allow other candidates, staff or constituents as well. Full stop.
These are all great ideas but after writing this blog I realize I'm not the one to bring them about. I'm an Indie actress. I write stories about what could be, was, and is.
Democratic candidates need to stop bashing Barack Obama and his legacy. My life was saved (literally) due to the ACA. I was able to have life saving surgery because it eliminated the pre-existing condition. So Democrats, let's start to build on the ACA, not tear it down.
P.S. See that was nicely put.
I want to offer a sincere apology to any of the candidates I vehemently criticized at the debates on this blog, which may have sounded harsh or over the top. I just don't want to see Donald Trump in office. I don't want our eventual nominee wounded to the extent that he or she is damaged goods and Donald Trump goes on to win. Policy differences are one thing, attacking is another.
As an LGBTQ+ activist Indie actress filmmaker, a lot is at stake for my community. Never mind me, I can take care of myself. I worry about the LGBTQ+ youth who are being told they don't count or they don't matter or that they're not human by this administration. I can't allow that. Call that the "mother bear" in me, but something has to be done and we can't have four more years of Donald Trump.
Once again I apologize.
Please remember that you belong and you matter to someone or something (like the family pet) So please stay in the game. You belong and you deserve to be here. We all need to stay together as we will weather the storm and come out from the darkness and into the light. Ok, sounds kinda cheesy I'll admit.
How about We're gonna make it. Better days will come. It won't make up for the past, but we can always start again. In the words of Red Green - (Comedian Steve Smith) "Keep your stick on the ice."
It would be great if the Democratic candidates would reexamine their attacks on the front runner Joe Biden and focus on how they would be a better choice than Donald Trump. After watching the talking heads in the media about the debate, voters want to hear how the candidates are going to help them and this great country of ours instead attacking each other and Barack Obama. Life is about choices and in the long run it will hurt the Democrats more than help, if we don't come together.
I can see pointing out differences but the candidates on last nights stage where not doing that. They were attacking and they weren't being nice about it. Booker standing next to Biden in a photo I saw on the news, demonstrated how much bigger and taller he was compared to Biden. It made him look much taller and his body language was like, "I'm going to body slam you old man, for coming after me. The expression on his face showed real anger towards Biden. The optics were not good for him. It will backfire and he needs to fire his advisors. In return, Joe shouldn't have come after Booker on certain issues that attacked his record as well. So both of them should be more aware of that in the next debate. All the candidates need to cut it out. Stop it!
Julian Castro wasn't above the fray either. His attacks on Biden were misguided. He lumped Obama and Biden in with Trump. There's no distinction or equivocation. Obama/Biden was the best and most progressive team ever in the White House. They saved our country from disaster and brought us out of the ditch the Republicans put us in. Show some respect for your elders. Also he needs to stop using the line, "We will say Adios to Donald Trump." It's not funny anymore.
I thought he was better than that. I thought he had class. That's why I started to reconsider my vote for Biden and choose him. But to me he portrayed himself as a bully going after an older gentleman who's made some mistakes in his political career but has apologized for them. Booker and Harris are beating a dead horse regarding Biden's past record. Let it go and move on the prosecuting the case against Donald Trump. Be the one to go after Trump, not Biden and visa versa.
In fairness to the candidates, CNN had some pointed questions that orchestrated the kind of discourse that occurred. They pitted one candidate against the other. In the next debate I think that it will be up to the candidates to turn the tables on the moderators and refuse to go down that rabbit hole. They'll need to be the ones that keep the focus on why they think they're better equipped to beat Donald Trump than the rest of the pack. We don't want a candidate that's been beat up to Face Donald Trump because the Republicans will use it against him or her. So stop it! Be the bigger person.
Yes! Unity damn it!
Joe Biden should watch (the film) and be like Paul Newman in "Cool Hand Luke," in to tonight's debate. Don't be like "angry grandpa," being too aggressive. In that case the voters will bail on him. Be like cool but firm. Cool Hand Joe.
Corey Booker and Kamala Harris need to tread lightly in tonight's debate because if it looks like they're ganging up on Joe Biden, they will alienate Independent and Moderate voters.
They need to ask themselves if they are ready for the blow back that will inevitably happen (regarding their records) if they attack him. Just saying. However, if Kamala or Corey won the nomination, I would vote for them over Donald Trump any day.
I don't like the other candidates except for Julian Castro. Next time please get your transgender facts correct. But he meant well.
Right now I'm leaning towards Joe Biden for President. He and Barack Obama provided the ACA which allowed me to get life changing surgery. Let's do Medicare for all, but give people an option to keep their private insurance or their ACA through the health markets. People have to have a choice or else nothing else will work. Get drug prices down and provide coverage and medication for transgender patients. It's a medical condition and it calls for medical care. Otherwise they will get it off the black market and that could be dangerous.
Relocating is not easy but sometimes necessary. To go where you're welcome. That's the ticket. But what if it's a form of escapism? What if you're meant to stay and fight? If you leave, will it negatively impact members of the same group you choose to fight for? What if you leave and people's lives are a bit emptier because you left them? But what if it comes down to your happiness over the happiness of others? What if you fail? Will those same people be there to catch you if you fall? Even more thought provoking is that if they can't wait to get rid of you?
That's where faith and good planning come in. Have a plan, then make up your mind and achieve your dreams. The people who love you like family will understand, and the selfish people in your life won't. So the answer is to go for it!
Sometimes when I wake up I want to reach for my phone and connect to the world of social media. I remember a time when that wasn't the case. Used to be the television gave one all the news and gossip. To some degree it still does, but today we're all tied to our phones. We gotta have that "fix."
How can this little device dictate how we behave? They're some benefits but it's not the same as face to face contact. We argue, praise and condemn people without thought to the consequences on social media. We piss people off sometimes. If we were to see them at the local grocery store or in the park, would we get on well?
Much of the information on social media can drive a wedge between us. As a cashier at a local grocery store I get to know and talk to all kinds of people from all walks of life. Politics comes up in about 1% of my conversations. If I really disagree with their point of view, do I treat them worse the next time they come through my line, or do I let it go? It's all about as my dad said, "trying to be right."
That's the rub. That's the question one has to ask themselves and if you come from a place of love, you will make the right decision. If you come from a place of hate, then the world around you becomes more divisive. We used to be able to disagree, but respect each others point of view. I would submit however; that the type of disagreements where reconcilable. Politicians used to compromise to get things done for the greater good. Not all decisions where good ones, but each side evolved, until 2016.
Our world is like a car with an automatic transmission that's stuck in second gear. We're revving our engines trying to get others to notice us and hear our side of the story without listening to theirs. We're so busy bitching (me included) that we stop listening and hearing each other. "My way or the highway!" So we tweet here we tweet there we tweet everywhere. It's like looking for the Scarlet Pimpernel.
The only way to get the transmission fixed is to put it in the shop. Maybe we should stop and turn off our phones more often or close our eyes and pray if we're that sort. We need to stop feeding the flame of sadness, despair, fear and loathing in our neck of the woods. We need to think before we tweet. Its become easier due to social media to "pile on" than to "back off." Ask yourself if that person where right in front of you, would you say to their face what you're about to tweet?
I'm not preaching apathy just control. It won't happen over night, and if one less person (myself included) refuses to reactive tweet, then slowly but surely we can make progress and fix our broken transmission.
It's sad to see any human or animal in pain or being mistreated. As our world has become unhinged, we've gotten meaner and crueler. Let's cut it out. Be kind compassionate to all living people and animals.
I want to ask that you all have a great week and remember to be kind. You don't know what someone is going through, so please be quick to forgive when someone else is acting like a cranky britches.
When the 35th President of the United States, John F. Kennedy, said let's go to the moon people thought he was crazy. Thoughts become things. Any great idea or plan started with a dream or desire in the mind of the creator. Of course it didn't happen overnight but it happened. Imagine if John F. Kennedy had said to his detractors; "Yeah you're right." "What a dumb idea to go to the moon." "I mean really." "What kind of LSD was I smoking?" Where would we be today? He didn't know the "How," but he had his "Why." Moreover, he had his passion, drive and determination.
I never told anybody in the town of West Jefferson NC, that I was writing a story about Will Banks because I knew they would try to poke holes in it and try to discourage me. I ignored them and wrote it anyway. It will be a web-series someday. Why? Because the story of Will Banks needs to be told for future generations to come. Now that they know about the film, many are still tying to stand in my way. Some of them are racists and alt right wingers who want to waive the rebel flag and go back to the old days of Jim Crow.
Some family and friends can be discouraging as well. They can try to cast seeds of doubt as you're thoughts are becoming things. I can tell you as the youngest of eight children, some of my siblings didn't think I would amount to anything. I was the one criticized for being the "black sheep" in the family. The "problem child." The indigent one. Some of my siblings have since come around but some still have a hard time wanting to see me succeed unless it's on their terms not mine.
When I was five or six my mom had a choice to make. Send me to public schools or an institution for mentally challenged youth. I would have been sent away to live in an institution for (which was sadly called back then) the mentally retarded. My mom said no. She knew better and put me first in Catholic School then Public. I surpassed all the educator's expectations and eventually graduated with a BA in Theater Arts from Appalachian State University.
I know a thing about that as I'm a parent of a child who's legally blind. I worry about him and I thought similarly when I would try to do things for him. Finally I had to let go. I did what my mom did. I had done my job by raising him and now it was time for him to fly. He has soared like an eagle and he's beaten the odds. I'm proud of him. You can read more about him on MyStory page.
So that leads me to my move to Vermont. I have a plan, I'm working the plan (with my Creator's help). Just like with my son Mack I had to put him in the Creator's hand and pray like heck that he would guide and protect him.
If you're out there and have doubters and haters, please don't give up on your dreams because others may not share them. Forgive them and move on. Don't hold grudges. Let go of the past and work towards a better future for yourself. People who count or matter will see your drive and determination and want to hire you or better still be included in your circle of friends. Find friends who will challenge you in a good way. Not in a way to tear you down but to build you up.
So have your plan, cultivate your plan, work the plan and have fun making your thoughts become things.
I had an amazing experience a few weekends ago. I buried the hatchet with one of my sisters who I was always fond of and looking up to as a child. I won't go into the "why" but I will say I feel at peace about it now. If you're at odds with a sibling, please patch it up today because we're not promised tomorrow.
Sometimes discerning where you need to be in life is difficult. If you do A then B or C are relative or irrelevant. You either win or loose. If you take a leap of faith you may fall on your arse or end up with the golden goose. Now that I've totally confused you, (which I sometimes do) I'm at that point. I have achieved a goal or milestone in 2016. I'm so grateful for it but now what? Sometimes after we get the one thing in life we've needed, we forgot to plan for what comes after our goal is achieved. Kinda like an athlete thinking that the play was whistled dead but it wasn't. There's more life to live. Or so we may think. You gotta keep on going. I've heard it said that "life's a journey not a destination." Run with the ball until the referee blows that proverbial whistle.
Sometimes I feel like a circus animal released into the wild after being caged and doing tricks for audiences for decades. Doing what I had to do to survive kissing arse to thrive. Following the status quo so that I wouldn't be laughed at or made fun of. Imagine feeling the grass on your feet (or paws if you were a circus animal) for the first time or tasting the rain pouring down on your backside, while running with the pack. That freedom to be yourself eluded me for many decades and now that I have this freedom I don't know what to do with it.
But it seems that there's always someone who wants to put you back in that cage. Put you back in the status quo circus that we call life. But heck no I aint going back. I can't. At least physically and I won't. To me I've always been me. To others' Iv'e been who they've wanted me to be. Somehow I'm I threat to their perception of their reality.
I was labeled Dyslexic, Dysgraphic, Hyper Active ADD & having a learning disability. But with my parent's help I made it all the way to graduating from College. The experts said it couldn't be done. I proved them wrong. The kid who defied the odds.
Have you ever seen one of those movies where the main character goes to bed and their life isn't the same as it was when they wake up? And when they do wake up they have a different spouse, house and family? That's the way I feel sometime. Well when my character woke up all hell broke loose. 2 failed marriages and alcoholism to boot. People where saying we don't like this person you've become get away. Bring back the circus act we grew up watching. You're not supposed to do this to us. You're supposed to perform the tricks that come with your manual. Well our manuals aren't the same and no more performances.
No more being the Jolly weirdo cashing her customers out at the grocery store. No more being the apologist for who I am, which you've come to know. I'm tired of being the puppet of your perception because my perception is the only one that matters.
I'm not less then and I deserve to be here. I'm not an abomination or freak of nature I will rise. I will be who I've always known I am. Me.
If you're reading this and you feel discouraged or down for whatever reason, please don't give up. I wrote I'm Your Mum - Torn Apart for all those people who either committed or where thinking about committing suicide. I've always been told that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Things change day to day and unlike my character in I'm Your Mum, sometimes we don't get second chances to do the right thing. The message in my web-series is clear. You do matter! You do count! You mean something to someone (or in the case of a furry friend) something.
Personally, I'm an alcoholic. I've been drug and alcohol free for 21 years. I was bullied mercilessly in elementary and High School; however, with the help of a Valiant Mom to guide me, I rose above the BS. I do believe that life will get better if we choose to make it so. I believe in meditation and prayer to a higher power. I focus on what a great person I have become despite the obstacles I faced growing up.
Sometimes we give bullies too much credit. We sometimes think that their opinion about us will make us or break us. That's a crock of poopy. Imagine in your mind that they are the size of an ant or a roach and you're looking down on them. Then imagine they have a cartoonish goofy look about them. Then just smile and walk away laughing. I like to take my hand and make a brushing motion on one of my shoulders when someone make a rude comment at my job. I smile, look up to the heavens and say thank you God (Creator, Universe).
Remember, you're greater than the haters' small minds will ever be with your higher power behind you.
Times are changing for the better for me as I plan on moving to the North Eastern USA. I'm tired of living in the South and I want to go where nobody knows my name. Where I can meet a new set of friends, co-workers, actors, directors, writers, and filmmakers, while staying in tough with those who mean a lot to me here. Sometimes we need new soil to grow in or a bigger body of water to swim in. If there is something positive in your life that you've put off, don't wait another day. Go for it!
The holiday season is upon us and speaking for myself I have a lot to be grateful for. I have a roof over my head a few jobs that keep me a float and certain family members who care about me. I have a decent sense of right and wrong and I care about the welfare and well being of my fellow citizens. I hate to see human and non humans suffer. I pray for a day when there is no suffering and we all treat each other with dignity, respect, tolerance and yes acceptance.
The last few years have been rough for us all but the sun is rising and a new day will dawn when we will make peace with our enemies and bring back civility to public service. That's going to require faith, hope, action. Theodore Roosevelt said, "Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far." We should also be willing to compromise. If not, we will have more of the same.
When Pat McCrory was elected governor he nixed the tax incentives for filmmakers, thus ending North Carolina's run as the number 2 spot in film-making in the USA. Our states' nickname was Wilmywood because Wilmington NC was the hub of all filmmakers.
However, thanks to the election of Roy Cooper things have changed. They're film incentives now that will bring people back to NC. According to the North Carolina Film Office, 31 Million in incentives are available now and that's nothing to sneeze at.
For those who didn't like the direction North Carolina was taking politically, it's a new day in North Carolina. In the 2018 elections the NC Democrats (who support filmmaker incentives) ended Republicans' Super-majority 2018. See election results in button below.
For all Georgia Filmmakers who are dishearten by the elections in that state or Florida, we welcome you back to NC. I encourage Indie filmmakers to take advantage of this, as well as my friends from across the pond. Please visit this website links below, to see the exciting new world of film-making in NC.
Welcome back to NC.